No sandwich generation for me

We baby boomers are often called the sandwich generation, a term I don’t like. Although, we are in the middle of other age groups, the term makes me feel smothered.

I prefer to think of us all as tree dwellers, and most of those in my age group are sitting on the wide, lower branches of a tree. The metaphor suggests freedom and perspective, which is better than being squished between two pieces of bread.

From those low branches, we mature adults can observe the trunk generation below us – our parents. Our children are dwelling in the branches above us – the ones growing in strength who will replace us one day; and our grandchildren dwell at the top of the tree where the thin, resilient branches sway and sparkle in the sun.

One of the things my age group has learned from our “tree trunks” is that we had better exercise while we can. Most older parents want to do it more, but they have problems.

My mother is an example. She signed up for a water therapy class where she held onto rails as she kicked and floated about. Her hands swelled double from arthritis. At her next appointment, she rode the therapist’s stationary bike. Therapists and nurses came running from all directions, shut off the bike and eased her into a chair. Her blood pressure had shot to the sky.

Mother quit therapy. She decided to walk a mile each morning with my stepfather. After three or so mornings, her legs and back hurt so badly that she gave that up. Lately, she has resorted to exercising while lying on the bed. She has certain leg lifts and stretches she does and even these cause some back pain. “I can’t fix one body part without messing up another,” she says.

Her frustration worries me about my own future.

Now to observe my adult children – I know too well what they are going through to find the time to exercise. They work long hours, care for babies, run after toddlers, help with homework (or do their own), sit at the ball field, clean the house, shop for groceries and on and on. My husband and I are only now recovering from those days, and God bless our friends who are raising their grandchildren. All of us know how important exercise is, but there are just so many hours in each day.

Now to observe our grandchildren’s lifestyles – they watch too many movies, and they play too many video games. They don’t play outdoors in many neighborhoods because their parents won’t let them, so they often play on playgrounds under supervision. If they play at an indoor gym at the fast food restaurants, they follow up play with french fries or an ice cream cone. No wonder their generation is the first to struggle with obesity.

Finally,, to observe my generation. We should get off the wide, deservedly comfortable, lower branches on life’s tree and work out with specific goals in mind. CNN recently reported that we should have built muscle mass during our 20s and 30s and concentrate now on maintaining it. Oops. Too many of us skipped the building part. I guess we’ll just maintain what wimpy muscles we have.

We have good reasons for not knowing to build body mass during our 20s and 30s. Neither our parents nor we baby boomers were taught from early ages the importance of exercise.

As late as the 1960s and 70s, we girls at Anniston High School got “A’s” for only dressing out in our gym clothes. If I remember correctly, we got a “B” if we did not dress out for two days and a “C” if we skipped four days. We sat along a chain-link fence where the downtown fire station is now. I plucked blades of grass from the ground because I was bored. Thank goodness for band practice after school. It’s probably the only reason I am not shaped like a tuba today.

So now we are educated and we have perspective. Our generation should show the younger folks that it is never too late to start exercising. Second, we should encourage our children to work out. Other news reports say 30 minutes a day, three days a week is better than nothing. Third, we should help provide safe places for our grandchildren to play outdoors and encourage them to lay down their remote controls and video games.

We also should encourage our elderly parents to exercise as best they can. Gentle, focused effort will help our parents be more like tree trunks. Even if their bodies cannot be as strong as their fortitude, the tree-trunk metaphor is better than their being a slice of bread on the bottom of a sandwich.